Monday, December 04, 2006

Us against them?

Why does it have to be us against them? Why do so many people have to be negatively affected by adoption? There are adopted mothers who are SO against the mothers who gave birth to their children and there are birthmothers who are so angry with the adopted mothers. Wasn't it Rodney King that said "can't we just all get along?"

5 comments:

kim.kim said...

Petunia, where I am standing there is unity.

My links sections has people from all sides of the fence, I have fabulous ad-mothers, adoptees and just mothers all on the same page.

There is a great need for reform and equality though, that's true, I think it's not realistic to expect one big happy family when coercion and injustice dominate the adoption industry of America and the rest of the world.

Just close your eyes for a second and see someone drugging you and stealing your baby and then see an adoptive mother telling you to get over it.....

This is reality for some mothers and that is why I consider myself one of the lucky ones.

petunia said...

The world is crappy and there are crappy people in it. I guess I shouldn't excpect the adoption industry to be any different.

kim.kim said...

The world is also wonderful too, it is not just crappy. I like to believe that so as to exist with some sanity.

The thing is Petunia, losing your child is not a positive experience no matter how you try to word it. Losing your mother can't be either.

The problems arise when people are told their feelings are incorrect or get negative labels when all they are doing is telling the truth.

I thought of you last night, I had a jazz gig and there were lots of old men in the band. The only youngish one was my husband.

You know the only thing you can do really is to be as loving as possible to the people close to you who have been affected by adoption. You, your mothers, your daughter, your daughter's mother.....you know, the people whose hearts you hold in your hands.

LeRoy Dissing said...

I am agreeing with you Petunia. The world is a s__t hole. Kim is right too in that there are some good people in it but that is more the exception then the rule. Buisnesses are out to make a profit and adoption agencies are not different regardless of their claim of being a "nonprofit". Babies are big buisness and as long as people are willing to pay big dollars to secure one, you can be sure there will be a capitalist around the corner.

The rain falls on everyone but so does the sunshine. I hope your day today is better then the one before it....

petunia said...

boy - did I sound bad. It just makes me mad that anyone has to make a lot of money in situations like these. In Iraq a woman who cannot care for their child leaves tham in the mosque and other woman come in and one will take in the child as their own. No money is exchanged. But there will always be those who try to make money from other people's sufferings or longings.