Thursday, October 19, 2006

Some Adoption Laws are good

I'm glad that in my state you have to wait six months to finalize an adoption. The judge and lawyer told us not to worry about it because the biomom and biodad both were in agreement, they were counciled and given options etc. but many who may not have told the biodad, or were coerced in a desperate time can have that six months to ensure no "funny business " went on, everything was done as much in the law as could be. Our date was set for December 20. Her name will be officially changed and she will be officially our daughter. It's like people getting married after living together for's just a piece of paper now, our hearts have been sealed since the day they told us about her.
She started to crawl last night! This baby time is going by so fast, and she'll be a toddler before we know it....i love every second!

Saturday, October 14, 2006

I Feel Sorry for the Bio-moms

Some of these ladies are ANGRY!

by Diane Turski

I had never heard the term "birthmother" until I reunited with my son. When the social worker who located me referred to me as his "birthmother," my first reaction was to instinctively recoil in distaste. What is a "birthmother?" It occurred to me that perhaps she had merely applied this ridiculous sounding term in an attempt at political correctness, so I ignored it. However, when my son's adoptive mother initiated her first contact with me she referred to him as my "birthson." What is a "birthson?" And what would a "birthfather" be - I didn't know that fathers gave birth! In a "birthfamily" are there also "birthsisters," "birthbrothers," "birthgrandparents," "birthaunts," "birthuncles," "birthcousins," "birthpets," etc?

She even says "birthmother means breeder"

I am offended by this as an adoptee. Whenever I have used the word "Birthmother" there has been nothing but respect behind it. My "bithmother" is just that....the woman who gave birth to me----that's a big deal. She is not my mother, thats the woman that raised me. But it takes nothing from what this woman did, I don't see her as simply a "breeder" or a nobody.
I do prefer "Biomom" because it explains it's the woman who made me biologically. She gave me my DNA...What I look like and many of my likes and dislikes.... what's so wrong about that??

She is my mother who gave me birth - she IS my BIRTHMOTHER!

Monday, October 09, 2006

Our Iraqi friends

I love my friends from Iraq. I love their food, their culture, their kindness ----i love those kids like they were my own.

Now, why are there so many different views on what the US is doing over in their country? My friend is over there now and his family is here. He is being an interpretor to help the US...he is putting himself in ALOT of danger to help the US get rid of all the trash over there that is ruining their country. When he was here for a month he was so sad that so many Iraqis are so against the US being there. He has seen it from the inside of the military, he knows what they are going one is grateful. Some say it was better when Sadam was in charge!!! Do they know what war is? War is HELL, war is aweful but maybe it's what is needed for change. My friend is so sad his country is in such termoil and he thinks it will take years for there to be any change. But there WILL BE change. If the US leaves there will be more caos, more bloodshed than anyone can imagine. There will be NO PEACE, for ANYONE left in Iraq.
I pray for his safety and for the safety of all the innocent Iraqis........

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Adopted? Whose Adopted?

I know many Biomoms don't like it but I totally forget my baby is adopted and not mine. I don't think about it for a long time and then someone brings it up.....and i think...."oh yea" for a split second it suprises me. I guess it's the same way being adopted myelf----i forget. I tell my parents they are the best mom and dad anyone could have. I don't give it another thought that I'm not biological . They are mom and dad - %100. When I think about what my daughter will look like I imagine a thin dark version of T....then i think - "no, wait her biodad has red hair and has children with blond hair....she must look like her bio mom, but she was short and biodad was tall so maybe she'll be tall like him/us" .....and then I forget again. She looks so much like us....she has my hair color, T's eyes, my dimple and she's left handed like T----so weird.

You know her biomom (and biodad) will always be a part of her (just as mine are a part of me - thier DNA made us have our looks and our tastes) but it's something you just don't think about most of the time. That makes me sad because I know the biomoms are always thinking about them. But.....think about it like this: You would want parents for your baby who don't think about your child as someone else's but love them SO much they forget that they are not their biological child.

I LOVE MY BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!