Monday, February 19, 2007

Bitterness

Bitterness can do a lot to people. It can turn basically decent people bad, it can wither away a soul, it can make them ugly from the inside out. Why waste a life with bitterness? There is so much better out there, so much happiness to be had. Many adoptees blame their bad lives on being adopted. That very well may be, you caught a bad break. What do biological children have to blame it on? I guess they blame their parents - there, that's done...someone is to blame.

You can only blame sadness & bitterness, happiness & success with realationships on one person...yourself. NO ONE will keep me from being happy but me. I don't let other people have control over me that easily.....do you? Does it matter what anyone does to you? You still have a brain, a reason, a will.....

I AM a happy adoptee, not "brainwashed", not "fooling myself", not "missing the life i never had"....any of that bull crap. Adoptees that say that they are unhappy and regret being adopted...yada yada yada....they need to know they cannot blame adoption. Maybe they can blame the lame adopted parents they had, or the crappy agency that did it to them. But you cannot blame your birthmothers and you cannot blame adoption itself.

There are too many happy adoptees out there to say that adoption DID anything to anyone. Circumstances are different for everyone. But no matter what you have a choice....a choice to remain bitter and mean (and some get a kick out of it) or to be happy and live your life to the fullest with love, forgiveness, respect and happiness.

3 comments:

TeamWinks said...

Your last post made me chuckle!

This was an interesting post, and a different perspective on what I continually read on adoption blogs. Thanks for writing it!

Erika said...

i think everyone has the right to their own thoughts, feelings and opinions, even when i disagree.

but your blog has really peaked my interest. you are an adoptee and now you are an adoptive mother. does this not say something about how adoption affected you?

i respect that you are "happy". i'm just curious. mostly because the woman who went to great and unethical lengths to take my baby and adopt her, was also adopted too.I'm curious as how one person can say they are "okay" and go on to repeat things positive or negative. i know every adoption is different and hey good for you. the get over it mentality just doesnt quite jive with me. i agree we all have a choice, but some of us do not have the 'ability' to make a choice. myself and my mother are case in point. shes an adoptee and im a first mother. sorry but i'll never not feel bitter. i can only learn to not let it rule my life. ok srry but i was just interested.

Peace and Love! :o)

Anonymous said...

you are my new favorite person!

christine