Julie was nice enough to link me over to birthpsychology.com where I found the craziest article
( a few actually). When does Adoption Begin? is by Marcy Wineman Axness. I am trying to think positive about what she means...at best she's saying that all mother, even birthmothers should love their children prenatally and treat herself and the unborn child well. But I'm afraid it's not that simple and she's claiming all sorts of nonsense. She is trying to claim an "umbilical affect" when it comes to adopting (note that this guy is a "primal therapist":
"British physician and primal therapist Frank Lake believed that if maternal emotion, or "umbilical affect," is negative, the fetus feels unrecognized and insignificant (Maret, 1997.)"but she quotes one birth mother as saying :
"I now know that this left my child very alone in the womb. He must have felt that no one cared about him, since these mythical parents-to-be were nowhere around and I had vacated my motherly responsibilities to him, in deference to their feelings. Sometimes I wonder if this is why, as a seven-month-old baby, he still doesn't smile very much."This preposterous notion is so sad to me. This makes the birthmother blame herself for her whole life and makes her feel she may not have done the right thing....the guilt she will carry is unfounded. It is letting this woman believe that the child has these sorts of feelings in the womb....and this is absolutely not true. More later...I have a life.....