Monday, January 28, 2008

Obama and Clinton - talk about a bad economy!

I hope people realize if either of the two "children" win.... our economy will be shot to H*LL. They both want to increase the dividend and capital gains tax ----ludicrous! You think our stock exchange is bad now? You think retired people have a hard living on dividends?? The Democrats want to make people with money pay more - but in doing so you will stop people from buying and selling stock....you will stop investment....I hope the democrats start paying more attention! How people that are college educated can be so stupid is beyond me!!!!!????

Obama also said he would repeal the Bush tax cuts for the wealthiest 1 percent of Americans....come on...idiot....who makes the world go 'round here? These are the guys who give the jobs, build the businesses and help our economy...stupid stupid stupid.

looked at another way Obama is telling us he supports a 268% tax increase on consumers...

Saturday, January 26, 2008

A baby in the womb....can you cut this up and suck it out?

A human embryo at 7 weeks gestation, measuring approximately 14 mm (crown to rump). The upper limbs, fingers, and face are developing and growing rapidly but are still forming their shape. The eye is developing but is not functioning yet. The brain is developing rapidly and the blood vessels supplying it with blood are clearly visible.

Hand of a fetus at 15 weeks gestation. At this stage the fetus measures approximately 92 mm (crown to rump), the fetal face and limbs are well formed, the eyes are sealed shut but are sensitive to light, the fetus can hear and responds to some sounds with movement, and fingernails and fingerprints have developed. The fetal bones have been stained with a dye which only stains the calcified regions.
Human fetus at 16 weeks gestation, measuring approximately 110 mm (crown to rump). At this stage, the fetal face and limbs are well formed, fingernails can be seen on the hands, and fingerprints have developed on the skin. The eyes are sealed shut but are sensitive to light, and the fetus can hear and respond to some sounds with movement. The fetal bones have been stained with a dye which only stains the calcified regions.


The new ultrasounds have given scientists and doctors a new perspective on life inside the womb:
12 weeks

24 weeks


26 weeks
Too many people who think abortion is okay will try to tell themselves it's humane and it's not a child. Anyone who thinks that should look at THIS video...all the way through..... if you can.
It's from the 80s and it is powerful- imagine what they could do now with the newer technology? Even then, people who saw this video had a change of heart. Don't take a blind eye.....watch it.

Friday, January 25, 2008

Hillary, the Movie...and more

THIS is not a joke, it's a real movie that the Clintons are doing everything they can to stop.

If anyone would bother really getting into her past and her record they could NOT, in good conscience, vote for her.

Even though there have been reports that the "Clinton Casualties" are all made up THIS site (and many others) tell the names of people who have really died mysteriously and had something to do with the Clintons...

And what about all those papers that are "under lock and Key" in the white house? Bill has ordered that zillions of so-far-unreleased documents in the National Archives, concerning the former first lady’s activities in the Clinton White House, will remain unreleased for several more years (2012 to be exact). Why can't we see memos between Hillary and Bill on such policy issues as welfare reform or Bill’s advice to Hillary on her 2000 Senate campaign? What are we NOT supposed to find in all of it? I'm surprised she wouldn't have shred all the controversial papers like she did with Vince Foster's documents and the Health Care Task Force.

Came across this great web site, The Hillary Project --- a great site that reports on Hillary when the liberal media will not.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Like fights on the Playground

I cannot STAND these two - -----good God....I hope neither of them fool enough people to actually win! (they should be SO embarrassed)

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Fed up with Generation Whiner?
What happen to the good old days when people were not wusses?
I am to the point of being sick and tired of cry babies (no, Gershom, this has nothing to do with you).
I just got done reading an article by a therapist that wrote:
"Every adoptee loses their birth family, even in open adoptions. Loss creates sadness and anger and sometimes depression. Loss leads to yearning and mourning for what is no longer ours. Adoptees can sometimes feel this on a daily basis."
Bla, bla, bla.... give me a break. Is our society so hung up on our "feelings" and so self centered they need all this therapy for all their "problems"?....hmmm...."your parents didn't give you enough validation and I think it's all because you were adopted"...that will be $100 please.

Has anyone talked to people who are over 70? These people lost parents, children, spouses, went through the depression - barely making it, some went through war (some of the men killing the enemy). Even my own mom lost her mother at a young age during the depression and two of the children had to live with the priest for a few years. Those were hard years and people went through much more than any other generation....but you don't see them going to therapists or whining about their pasts. They are the most hard working, happiest and honest people you will meet (as a whole).

So when did it become "all about me"....the generations of
selfish whiners?
Therapists will tell you about all the people who are unhappy....well, hell0----that's all they see...that's why people go to therapists. So, if they see 100 patients everyone is unhappy? Come on.....we don't know what hardship and sadness is.....we all have it way too easy and I guess people need something to complain about.

Live your life....make it happy and leave the past in the past.....what have you lost??????? TIME WORRYING ABOUT IT ALL.

************end of rant

Monday, January 21, 2008

Adoption, Adoptees and NOT speaking for everyone

In response to a comment I decided to write a post just about my feelings on adoption adoptees, birthparents and adopted parents. One of the reasons I write anything is that many prospective adopted parents spend time scouring the blogs for any information about adoption before they take the plunge. Not too many happy adoptees write anything...why should they. However, they are the majority. I want these people to have hope about adoption, to know that most adoptions work out okay, that not everyone is anti-adoption and birthparents and adoptees are out there living normal lives and happy with themselves and their life in general.

Now, I realize not all adoptions are good, not all turn out well, and not all adopted parents are good. But for the most part things are okay in the adoption world and only a small percentage of people have bad experiences. Is that taking anything away from people who have not had a good adoption experience? - NO...In a perfect world everyone could stay with their biological parents, everyone could conceive and have their own biological children and everone would live happily ever after. But that does not happen.

All adoptions are different because all people are different. Is anything perfect about adoption...no. There are people who cannot keep a baby for many different reasons, there are people who want to adopt a baby for many different reasons and there are good and bad people out there trying to help those people....what a mess.

So, as birthparents and as adopted parents you find a place where people care about you, there are rules and ethics and things are done legally. That's the best anyone can do.
I am one of the few people that write about how well adoption can work....It didn't start out that way but I feel that someone has to have good stories in the blogisphere or we are going to have everyone going to different countries to adopt ( and there are plenty of children here who need adopted parents).

Children need to be able to locate their biological family when they grow up and you have a hard time doing that when they are in another country with bad records.

So...for the record, I do not speak for all adoptees because we are all as different as snowflakes. But there are 6 million adoptees and the curve is high for happiness.....

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Another Reason to like John McCain

McCain has always had a strong view on pro-life (check his record folks) - even though
THIS article may suggest he is using his adopted daughter as a stand on pro-life.....I say...So What?
Use me....I've always said I'm a poster child for pro-life, every adoptee is. Except for a few whacos you are going to find most adoptees say "thank goodness my biomom was pro life". Everyone has the right to live....doesn't the child have a choice?

I don't agree about his stand on stem cell reasearch but he is in the camp that three - 10 cells if not a human yet.....I disagree.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Is it a form of Hypochondria?

I have read a few negative blogs lately that all claim the same thing...."I thought I was well adjusted and being adopted didn't bother me until I started reading these blogs...."

ARG, is it like Scientology where even though it's crazy people follow?
or like some sort of hypochondria where you are convinced something is wrong?
I think it's quite interesting how they are fine for 20 or thirty years and BOOM...all of a sudden they have a problem with it...when they know they can get, what?....support, empathy from strangers, some feeling of solidarity? Does it really do something for them?

I know there are a few adoptees with some psychological problems...I won't name names.....but these may be legit claims. Is it from adoption? Or the family they grew up in? Who knows, it may be in the genes.....but, how many people must one convince they too have problems before they convince themselves their problem is legit?

I had never realized there were so many unhappy people out there....always looking for something to blame it on.....

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Being an Adoptee

Adoptees are odd to the outside world -- the whole concept is hard for them to grasp....they can't imagine how they would feel because they have no point of reference. Shoot, it's an odd thing for the adoptees too.....we don't know how NOT to feel like an adoptee but I'm quiet certain it's not that much different from what biological children feel about their parents. They are our parents....period.
Okay, so there are a few differences in our looks perhaps....so? Our nationalities may even be different.....so? We feel the same about our parents....they're ours.

If I was disfigured but biologically related to my parents....would there be questions? Would my parents wonder why I couldn't look just like them and vice-a-versa? Absolutely not.
If two biological blond haired, brown eyed parents give birth to a child who is red headed and blue eyed...would there be a question that the child didn't love them as much?

So, being adopted means we have a more interesting past, more people that care about us --- they care enough to give us a future. Are we loved more than biological children then? Maybe.... It really is luck of the draw isn't it? - so is being born and living with your biological parents....you get what you get.....

I'll never forget talking to the lawyer who "filled in" when our adoption lawyer was out of town. We were just there to sign some preliminary papers before we brought J home but he was an adopted father. I don't know how we got on the subject but he somehow intimated that he was fearful that his daughter would grow up and want to find her biological parents and he would lose her. I assured him it really didn't mean that and he should let her/help her. I told him how much I love my parents but felt a need to find my biofamily. I told him how I felt about it all - with my husband sitting there hearing me talk about what I don't think I had actually voiced in his presence before.
The man was so grateful to talk to me about it. He said he had only helped out for this adoption lawyer a few times and it always made him think about it. I was the first adult adoptee he had met.

If you are not adopted you don't understand the feeling of just being curious and wanting to know things about your biofamily. It doesn't mean you're going to run off and join their family when you find them. Your parents are always your parents. The biofamily are strangers. It's almost a matter of closure. You feel you can move on after you find them, know the back-story, know why things happened the way they did....then back to your life.


My neighbors have a son and he is adopted. When we adopted J he was 15 and it brought the whole subject up in their family again. (It does get pushed to the background as life goes on). They talked about it then a little but now he is a senior and he is writing about it in English. The teacher talked to the councilor who talked to his parents....and suggested counciling. Counciling? I think that's funny, but if it will help him I guess....
It's just that coucilors have textbook answers, textbook reasons why and what for....
I had a long conversation with his mom in the grocery store and she and her husband were so upset that maybe they had done something wrong and it made him feel this way and question. I assured her that it had nothing to do with them and he still loves them and they are his parents. It's what many adoptees feel....curiosity, the need to know. It doesn't change their relationship. I told her how much I love my mom and dad and I would never want them to be hurt. That's why a lot of adoptees don't talk about it with the Aparents - they have such loyalty to them.

**Another thing is this boy's birthmom made a memory book of pictures from when she was little until his birth but when she talked with my neighbor she made her promise she would not give him the book or tell him about it until after he was out of high school. She hasn't told her son it exists because she promised but now she's afraid if she gave it to him he would think she held that back/lied and he would be angry. I wish he would talk to me about it.

I guess if I were an Aparent and wasn't an adoptee too I would be a little afraid. I wouldn't understand when my child wanted to know more about their birth family - I think I would be scared and wonder what I did wrong....

Don't worry Aparents..... we are just nosy creatures, we humans....

Sunday, January 13, 2008

I am Loved! I am an Adoptee....

As an adoptee I hear those sad adoptees who think they are rejected. That is simply not true. We adoptees are loved twice as much...more even. We are loved, cared about and cared for. We could have been rejected like many millions are rejected every year and sucked out of the womb bit by bit and discarded in a medical waste bin. But instead, our bio-mothers (and sometimes bio-fathers too) loved us so much they gave us a life, gave us a chance, gave us more people who love us.

My daughter's bioparents totally love her. They wish that circumstances could have been different but they wanted her to have the best life and people who would love and care for her.....

I feel so loved......I feel sorry for those who look at it any differently.
Charity giving

UNICEF sounds like a great organization - wow, they have great ideals....
The sad reality is that only $0.20 of ever dollar goes to the children. The rest is eaten up by the UN for program administration.

Which means that out of the $15 billion collected for the program in 2006 only $3 billion was actually spent on children.

A reporter a few years ago did an investigation and followed the money trail, he was surprised to find that the money collected for UNICEF, a good portion was used to buy tanks for the Cubans in Angola.

Give.org is one organization you can use to look up a charity to whom you are donating.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

What is the Difference between a Fetus and a Baby?

A Missouri woman has been charged with involuntary manslaughter after her unborn baby dies from meth. So.........If she went to an abortion clinic, that's okay....that's disposing of a "fetus". If she took drugs and she kills her unborn "baby", then it's illegal...... I'm sorry, there is something definitely wrong with this picture.

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Baby Max back with the Stocklaufers!
A Jackson County judge ruled the child must be returned to Gary Stocklaufer and his wife. Gary had said the reason the judge took the child from their home was because he was obese (over 550) but he has since had gastric by-pass and he has lost 200 pounds. The child was with them from 4 weeks to 4 months and is coming back to them at 8 months. For those missing 4 months the baby boy stayed with a family that was trying to adopt him.

The actual reason for removing the baby from their home, so says a judge, was because the Stocklaufers had not followed proper procedure when moving the baby across state lines. Baby Max is actually a relative of the Stocklaufers and now back with the family.

Saturday, January 05, 2008

A beautiful story from an adopted mom

Read it HERE

Friday, January 04, 2008

Scientology is scary and spooky...

Ron Jr. remembers his father as a "broke science-fiction writer" who espoused that the road to riches and glory lay in selling religion to the masses.

A guy makes up a religion and "sells" it to some of the richest people in the world---wow, i wish he would have used that power of persuasion to help the poor or something.

Thursday, January 03, 2008

Domestic Adoption is still possible

Read a great article about breaking down the stereotypes of domestic adoption and birthmoms....people don't think that you can still adopt children from the US--I know we have had many people ask us "where is she from?"...."here", I usually say....after a pause it's always the same response, with eyes open wide-- "here???" - like they didn't hear right.
Here's a little excerpt:

"Even as domestic adoption evolves, negative stereotypes of birthmothers refuse to die out. Attorney Mark McDermott has been working to correct such stereotypes for 21 years. “Sometimes I feel like I have not made a dent,” he says. Most damaging are the portrayals of birthmothers as heartlessly “giving up” their children. In reality, most of them have made a painful, but loving, choice—one for which there is very little societal support.

Despite the perception that most birthmothers are irresponsible teenagers, many are single mothers who already have a child, and who face economic pressure to place a child. “Women are educated and empowered to make a choice, and they want the best life possible for their child,” says Steve Kirsh, an adoption attorney in Indianapolis. Adoption professionals see a crying need to de-stigmatize adoption, and to fight the damaging biases that discourage women in crisis pregnancies from considering adoption. "

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

A New Year - A year for Families to grow!

I pray that this new year helps to find many kids new adopted families and the families to find those kids.....
There are too many couples waiting....waiting..... I know how that waiting can feel SO long and hurt So much.

2008 - the year of LOVE!

There is so much light on adoption now. With all the Hollywood stars adopting - it's made it less of a taboo thing to talk about for the general public. "Adopted and proud" - we "happy adoptees" have always felt this way...it's everyone else who never knew what to say.....

*Hallmark has a series of on line stories (really good)
*The Dave Thomas foundation is even trying to help with a credit card just for adopted families through Chase Bank. Of couse many of the banks give special Adoption loans already.
*There is a Pro-life license plate program to raise funds to help women who choose to not abort but relinquish their child in adoption.
* Hollywood has come out with a few movies about adoption recently like Bella(A+)and Juno(C).
* More and more companies are providing some monetary help for their adopted parent employees.
* Airlines are providing cheaper fares for those adopted parents going overseas

Any more you can think of? Adoption is at least getting much more good press....maybe more of the foster kids will catch a break too.....I pray this year they find a forever home!

Tuesday, January 01, 2008

JUNO - over all a C (the end was a B+)

Okay, we saw it; me (an adoptee and amom) and my best friend (a birthmom). I don't know how to react to it actually. Most was done "Hollywood style" but their were elements in it that rang true. It was hard onmy friend, their were things that were hard for her to watch and for me too - but I knew they were not the same things. She laughed at some things when I didn't and vice-a-versa. most of the time I just thought "well, that was crude".

I thought at first I was going to hate the movie, when it started I realized this was not going to be a true and serious story about what this girl was going through. She was 16 and had it all wrapped up...she was witty, mature and unemotional about the whole thing. I wasn't sure I even liked her. I felt sorry for her, not because she was pregnant but because of her family, her friends and her environment.

But, it sort of sneaks up on ya---about a third or more of the way through....you start thinking...."hmmm, maybe she's just acting tough". By the last fourth you have a decision to make - is it a good movie or not? Do you really care about what happens or not? Will you hate this movie or not? And I actually sarted to like it a little better---I wanted whoever did the last bit of the movie to go back and do the rest of it over again.

I was thinking the whole time it was a Cor C-
But, by the end I thought it was a B- or B

In the end I don't think it's done anything to persuade adoptions or dissuade girls from relinquishing...it was just a story about this girl, her situation and nothing more.