In response to a comment I decided to write a post just about my feelings on adoption adoptees, birthparents and adopted parents. One of the reasons I write anything is that many prospective adopted parents spend time scouring the blogs for any information about adoption before they take the plunge. Not too many happy adoptees write anything...why should they. However, they are the majority. I want these people to have hope about adoption, to know that most adoptions work out okay, that not everyone is anti-adoption and birthparents and adoptees are out there living normal lives and happy with themselves and their life in general.
Now, I realize not all adoptions are good, not all turn out well, and not all adopted parents are good. But for the most part things are okay in the adoption world and only a small percentage of people have bad experiences. Is that taking anything away from people who have not had a good adoption experience? - NO...In a perfect world everyone could stay with their biological parents, everyone could conceive and have their own biological children and everone would live happily ever after. But that does not happen.
All adoptions are different because all people are different. Is anything perfect about adoption...no. There are people who cannot keep a baby for many different reasons, there are people who want to adopt a baby for many different reasons and there are good and bad people out there trying to help those people....what a mess.
So, as birthparents and as adopted parents you find a place where people care about you, there are rules and ethics and things are done legally. That's the best anyone can do.
I am one of the few people that write about how well adoption can work....It didn't start out that way but I feel that someone has to have good stories in the blogisphere or we are going to have everyone going to different countries to adopt ( and there are plenty of children here who need adopted parents).
Children need to be able to locate their biological family when they grow up and you have a hard time doing that when they are in another country with bad records.
So...for the record, I do not speak for all adoptees because we are all as different as snowflakes. But there are 6 million adoptees and the curve is high for happiness.....