Thinking About Adoption?
Here are some rules...since we are making some up....
RULE #1 When Adopting:
Look through every agency in your area, ask around and find people who have adopted and what agency they used...where they happy with them? Was everything handled without complication?
Then get their literature, talk to someone there face to face, if you can, to get that first "gut instinct"....if you feel uncomfortable at this point - run away! Ask how they advertise, what happens when a girl/woman comes in, what kind of counciling they get. They should be able to pick a profile for themselves if they decide to place...and they should not do it until the last trimester. Is the agency small and able to take care of everyone? Also ask about your state's laws and the city the agency is in will have their own court proceedings.
5 comments:
I agree...and check to see if they are licensed by the state. Many states require that adoption agencies become licensed as child welfare agencies since they place children. Therefore, they must meet certain standards and if they do not, the state can suspend or revoke their license - essentially putting them out of buisness.
You bring up an important point, that you should do a lot of research when choosing an agency. It's important to check out the ethics, too. On both sides -- aparent and bparent.
I look forward to seeing your other rules.
Hmmm, we did everything you stated, we even asked a reputable adoption attorney in the area, and our agency does the things you listed, BUT they also had a good advertising spiel...they do have a money making business afterall. My favorite is that they told us the longest time period for an expectant mother to select adoptive parents through their agency was 11 months, right... (imagine Dr. Evil of Autin Powers). I don't hate our agency, I just wish that they had been honest with us.
Trace, first of all I am so sorry you have had to go through this - you are a normal, good looking couple with a great house in a nice neighborhood. I looked at your profile on line - shoot, you could adopt me....
We just don;t know the reason--- maybe all of that was to lead you to DI and it just took you all this to get there....
And Trace, maybe the agency gives an average----some people must have gotten matched VERY quickly so it threw off the average....when they say 11 months...it may mean some were longer. They told us 1-2 years.....we were called in 4 months. I hate that you have waited so long - you will know the reason when you are holding your baby....I feel we waited 13 years for baby J.
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