Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Mean Girls revisited

It's interesting how many people backed off (except a few anonymous cowards) when I wrote about mean girls. Maybe a few realized they are mean but most mean people don't realize they were/are mean. They live their lives making a pathway of misery for people and never know it. They may never know that people talk about them behind their backs about how they aren't liked because of their "sucky" attitudes. I have seen it with my own eyes...all talking and laughing and the minute one of them walks away...the other girls talk about how they "can't stand her".....I hate that. I am who I am and am no different behind closed doors.

I was recently at a high school reunion and some of the "mean girls" were there. The first thing I noticed is they were "worn" looking, tired, haggard. It's work being mean and holding animosity towards the world. What made them be that way? Was it bad parents? Was it bad relationships? Something to prove? Maybe they are just sad, hurt and want relief by causing other people to hurt worse.... I don't know. A few must have had revelations and they had become different, they even looked different around the eyes - not so hard.

I graduated in a class of 99 and there were only about 50 there but there was a good mix of the jocks, mean girls and the "brains". One girl works now for NASA. She worked in Russian for a long time on the space station, she married a goat farmer from Turkey...she was the Valedictorian and weighed about 340 pounds in high school. She was one of the nicest girls, we were friends but the mean girls taunted her back then. She's now about 135 pounds and cute as a button...guess who flocked around her? Guess who wanted now to be her friend? She hung out with us most of the night...she wanted no part of them, but was cordial. The mean girls had a deep affect on her and I'm sure they will never know how they hurt her or care.

We live in different worlds, them and I. We think differently, act differently. They still are difficult, hateful and shrewish at times. I guess we can all get that way - but to them, it's a way of life--but they don't see it. We all see it from the outside looking in.....most of the bad comments are from people who are just the same. They see themselves as normal, happy people but they are not. They live to tear others down so that they feel better about themselves. The worse the comments are the worse I feel for them...how bad and miserable their lives must be.

They will never know that they are a mean girl.

UPDATE:
I deleted this post - but I will list it here...it makes me laugh. I don't go on their blogs (well this smart alec says she doesn't have one - but I know who it is) and bad mouth them and bring them down - but she is accusing me of being a mean girl...makes me laugh....
you are mean. and hateful and two faced and a liar and you want your daughter to lie to your fake parents about knowing your real parents. you truly make me sick. i dont have a blog. i do not want one. so i remain anonymous.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...
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Joy said...

I dont' know, a lot of this sound cliche like something from a movie.

I don't think there are necessarily mean people and nice people, just regular people who are sometimes mean and sometimes nice.

Just because someone isn't popular doesn't make them nice. Just because someone is "polite" doesn't make them two-faced.

It is nice when people have compassion for others, and aren't cruel or mock their pain, sometimes I am a very compassionate person, and sometimes I am really nasty.

While it is nice when people are compassionate, I don't see us as under an obligation to be. Many people live their whole lives without compassion for others who struggle, or who are denigrated by society and say, "who cares you are just a freak out" and then quote Jesus, which is super cute because Jesus loved all the little freak outs.

But that it how people are, predatory, you can tell they have both eyes on the same side of their head, so they can track their prey.

petunia said...

Joy, you have left nice comments before. You have opinions and stick with them...that's normal. We all have the capacity to me angry but I really try NOT to be so mean that I hurt people. There are those people who just don't care - sometimes they were poplular in school and sometimes not. But there are "mean girls" out there now who are pretty much isolated now because people don't like them very much. They are hard to live with and hard to be around (I work with one---who has a few nice things to say but usually follow it with some snide remark). I'm sure she wasn't popular in school - I was just making a reference to the movie when I talked about all that. Popular, unpopular...mean is mean.

ani said...

I actually believe that you are happy Petuania, in fact you sound so much like me a few years ago.

You sound so much like me it kinda freaks me out, you are also alot younger then I.

Especially the jesus/god stuff, really in the last post you made about god having a plan for us, umm yes that was me.

I just don't buy it anymore.

There is nothing wrong with you believing that, it is comforting to believe that, I remember what it is like.

I have to agree with Joy, I usually do.

I have a tendency to be mean, I also can be very compassionate.

I suppose it depends on the day and the person.

I am human, not perfect. I am the first to admit my downfalls, and do it a lot. Like my spelling and grammar it sucks,,lol

My problem with you I suppose is that you seem to come across as to perfect. Flawless.

But that is just my opinion, I don't know you. I just read here. I find you interesting. Who knows Petunia you might teach me something. But back to what I was saying, I have seen you lash at at people who have left comments that you did not like. I mean, we all have it in us to be mean, like you said you try to not be, but you can be IMO. I really don't care to much anyways, I again think you are interesting.

There was a girl I knew in highschool that who hated my girlfriend. She picked up a dead cat off the road that had been run over. She put it on the doorstep of my friends house. Now that is mean. That is pure hatred. People are capable of some nasty stuff. Pure Sociopathic,, the kind of person that comes across so nice but is a total wacko, she was like that.

But for some reason when it comes to stuff like moral issues such as adoption I think people can be really prone to becoming emotional or spitefull. I think that this is a very important issue just as you do, and I am very passionate about it, so I think that most of us even yourself can become a bit fiesty about what our positions are.

OH well,, anyways just my POV.

ani