Friday, May 18, 2007

Famous Adoptees

There are many famous adoptees....
click HERE to watch a short clip.


I didn't know how many awesome adoptees are out there...
Click HERE for another list

Click HERE for another site of famous adoptees

And HERE for still another

It's amazing how many of us turned out all right since
there are people that feel that it ruins everyone's life.

19 comments:

petunia said...

I find it interesting that no one can complain or shoot down the cold hard facts.... :)

Tishslp said...

I sure hope you can add ds to that list....the happy part, not necessarily the famous part :)

And yes, Petunia, you ARE right. There ARE happy adoptees...I think we should remember and advocate for those who are NOT happy, but this in no way takes away from the large number of happy adoptees here and in other countries.

Blogadict said...

Because its a list. Sorry you didnt get the reaction you were hoping for.

petunia said...

no reaction IS a reaction - you can't argue with the truth.....that's my point. This does not prove there are not unhappy people who are adopted --- it DOES prove that adoption doesn't have to ruin lives....in fact, it can be a boost.

petunia said...

Heather,

Thank you for visiting. I'm sorry if my "rantings" have upset you. I do not take away from anyone's experience as an adoptee, biomom or a-parent. My beef is that many adoptees and biomoms try to say that all adoption is bad and all adoptees have this profound sadness and phychological problems associated with adoption. I think it's a LIFE thing NOT an adoption thing. These people, on these lists, have made something of their lives...most don't seem like they have been that negatively affected by adoption....picking out one person out of all these lists is a little nitpicky...

petunia said...

heatherUK,
I have deleted your comment. You did write that I commented on my own post - It always suprises me when I post something that is very true that no one comments. You still didn't have to leave a response and my comment could have stood alone.
Infant adoptions are actually less harmful psychologically than later adoptions....my point is made that people CAN lead succesfull lives even in divorce, with step-parents and adoption. These things do not have to mold you in a negative way.

Tishslp said...

And yet, Petunia IS an adoptee and she is recording HER experiences on HER blog. If she's frustrated with people who blog on THEIR spaces about adoption, then WHERE ELSE should she go to air her feelings?

Sorry if this sounds personal. It really isn't personal against anyone. And I, of course, recognize that adoption could be very difficult, even traumatic, to someone under certain conditions. I even understand that it will affect different people in different ways, since everyone is an individual. The loss of a birthparent could be traumatic even in a "good" adoptive situation. Because we all respond to loss in different ways.

So, why isn't that good enough? Why isn't it good enough for Petunia to say she KNOWS that not every adoptee is happy, but she knows some that ARE and she's comfortable blogging about THAT? It seems to me that, unless adoptees say, unequivocally, that American domestic adoption is evil and wrong in most of the adoptions that exist, they are attacked.

I so don't want that for DS. I want to EMPOWER him to realize that, good or bad, this IS his life and HE is in charge of it. Happiness is a choice as much as anything else and, if he has issues with being adopted (which he very well may) that I support him 100% in doing whatever he needs to in order to find peace for himself. If that is "changing the system"....great. If it's something more personal....great. I just really hope and pray that, whatever he chooses to do, he doesn't try to negate the positive experiences of others.

Heatheruk: I'm so sorry you were hurt by what Petunia wrote. I didn't think in reading the blog that she was trying to hurt anyone's feelings, but you absoloutely have the right to that impression. And I hope you find comfort/healing from being hurt. Having been hurt myself, I know it's no picnic. But my question is...how does Petunia writing on her own blog prevent you from defining yourself or your own experiences? One of the great things about blogs IMO is, if you don't like what some people are writing, you stop visiting their blog and, for all intents and purposes, they no longer exist. Problem solved.

Sure wish I could that with some IRL people I work with! (hehehe)

HeatherUK said...

oh. ok. Bye then.

Best wishes

petunia said...

Thanks tishlp,

Heatheruk is always welcome to read this blog and even comment. She doesn't have to agree either, which I can see she does not. I'm not blogging for her or for anyone that is against adoption. I am blogging because I am one of hundreds of thousands happy adoptees that want adopted parents to know it does work. Again, it doesn't mean all adoptees have to be happy people....not all people are happy period, adopted or not.

ONE MEAN ANGRY ADOPTEE said...

Because she harps on the ones who aren't "happy" like her, that is why she goes after the ones that are very vocal about their feelings about adoption. Personally yes adoption can be good but the adoption system as it exists today is based on lies, coercion and deception. Instead of attacking other adoptees for their feelings, I would like to see Ms. Petunia tackle the unethical practices being allowed to continue. I would like access to my own original birth certificate. I feel that my contacting my own birth parents instead of a CI is better for all involved. My children are entitled to their health information just as I am. We are not debating whether or not there are happy adoptees. They do exist. Adoption as it stands now needs to change and be equal to all involved in adoption.

ONE MEAN ANGRY ADOPTEE said...

Even those who don't want contact with their natural families still want their original birth certificates.

Blogadict said...

The only truth is a list of people who have been adopted, by family, by steps and occasionally by strangers. The vast majority of those listed were adopted by family members and step parents. Many of those people have also overcome very hard lives. This list does not given their opinion on adoption. It is simply a list meant to promote foster care.
I have spent countless hours researching the effects of international and domestic adoption. The facts are: there are effects to being adopted within and outside the child's culture. Period. There is a wide range of effects felt by each particular child and in each particular situation but, there are effects no matter what.
The vast majority of those effects are directly related to the old fashioned attitude that pretending adoption is a non event will make it a non event. This is a grossly mistaken notion that has caused immeasurable "hidden" pain in adoptees.
From my research, the only children over 30 who did not suffer measurably from being adopted, were children adopted with biological siblings and/or spoke often and openly about the their unique situation. Having a biological sibling gave them a familial link. The open communication helped ease the shame and secrecy that adopted children felt. These issues were much more pronounced in cross cultural children.
While I have seen great strides in attitude and awareness, there are still many, many examples of disheartening ignorance.

Tishslp said...

one mean etc: I agree. Things DO need to change in adoption. I have yet to meet the evil people who don't agree that baby marketing or coercion or abuses in the system should stop. The thing is....Petunia DOES say that. If you read through her commments, she makes it clear just where she feels the system needs reform.

I dunno. I guess it's a chicken and egg thing, because I see OTHERS attacking Petunia for what she writes on her blog. But it seems pointless to argue or leave nasty messages for someone who just plain doesn't agree with you.

Sorry, P, didn't mean to hijack your blog....sorry about that. It just confuses me and I never seem to get a straight answer.

LeRoy Dissing said...

The facts are that family structure does not guarentee how a child will develop. There are many children raised with their own parents that have been "screwed up" in ways that are similar to those raised in some adoptive homes. There are also adoptess who were raised well adjusted in their adoptive homes....probably much better than they would have been had they been raised by their first/birth parents.

Social research shows a strong correlation between well-adjusted children raised by both their parents in one home. That doesn't mean a cause and effect relationship.

I don't think anyone is saying that growing up in your own parents' household guarentees that you will be a healthy, well-adjusted person anymore or less than being raised by adoptive parents guarentees that you will be an unadjusted, unhealthy person. Every caretaker raises the children entrusted to them differently and every child develops their own personalities as they age.

In an ideal world, every child would be raised by their own parents who are together, functional and healthy (emotionally, physically and psychologically) with the ability and resources to meet their child's needs. For many kids, if not the majority, that will not be the reality - and we do need to support families in whatever situation kids find themselves in. We owe it to the children.

petunia said...

mean adoptee...where do you get the idea I don't want open records? I think all adoptees should have access to their records at 18 (and health information any time). I was very angry when I could not get my own records - this is MY info! I think all fully-closed adoption should be stopped. We have a semi-open adoption and I share info with the biomom (which should be legally mandatory if the biomom wants it).

blogaddict...I would like to know where you get your "research"... I've done a lot of my own research. If you would identify yourself you could post all that research and it's resources on your blog so we could all read it.

tishslp - thank you...I know you are kind, rational, clear thinker.


Leroy...THANK YOU! You wrote exactly what I have been trying to say all along. Don't blame adoption on social bad behavior or family disfunction!

petunia said...

and blogaddict.... since I'm way over 30 (and so are many of my adopted friends)...your research must be a little off.

ONE MEAN ANGRY ADOPTEE said...

You do know that NCFA does not support open records. You have quoted them several times. They are not the most reputable group when it comes to adoption. They are profit goaled in this. They want to protect their own financial interests. Now the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute has very good information. I trust what they say. They are not controlled by adoption agencies. I just don't like what they have to say about my feelings in all of this. They are my feelings, my opinions, and my thoughts. I do not believe they should tell me or you how to feel.

petunia said...

Angry, I had to look up what NCFA was. I agree this is probably more $ oriented. I don't know what I quoted from them - but whatever it was we must both agree on that....but it doesn't mean I agree with all....

Tishslp said...

I guess what I am having difficulty understanding is WHY does one person's opinion INVALIDATE yours? If you don't like NCFA and Petunia finds some, or all, of their information helpful, why is that threatening? Why spend time trying to change HER mind when, as you pointed out, there is a need for people to tackle what we all agree is a problem in the adoption system.

Actually, best case scenario, we accept our differing opinions and put our efforts toward eliminating what we agree on needs to be CHANGED in the adoption system. I think we probably agree on more than we think we do.....