A Stereotypical Pile
A poster used these two words and I loved them. If you are new to adoption or wanting to adopt please know that adoptees DO NOT like to be thrown into a "stereotypical pile". I am an adoptee and fortunately have had a great life but I am also an adopted parent and am concerned about my own daughter not feeling negatively about adoption.
There are hundreds of thousands of adoptees who are happy and leading productive lives. Adoption has not had a negative affect on them and they don't think much about the whole thing.
You will find that there is a higher percentage of negative adoptee blogs out here in bloggland because there are those that feel their lives were negatively affected by adoption. There aren't many happy adoptees who feel the need to blog or journal. It's unfortunate that there are some who have had a bad life, whether it is due to adoption or in spite of it.
All you can do is make sure that as adopted parents you adopt through reputable agencies and make sure that the biological mothers are offered counseling and treated well. Think twice before choosing a closed adoption for the sake of your child. At least a semi-open adoption will give the opportunity for information and a possible reunion when the child is an adult, if they wish it.
There are many different opinions but don't let the negativity change your mind. Adoption is a wonderful way to have a family...there are woman deciding to place their child and walking into agencies. We, as adopted parents walk in and apply and these women are showed profiles. They are deciding. They are being offered the opportunity to decide. It IS bittersweet but these women want what's best for the child they will have and your job is to be the best parents you can be.
I have a unique perspective because I an adoptee who adopted. I feel like I'm being a great mom just like my mom and dad were.....
Leave comments or e-mail me if you have any questions.